The Two Noble Kinsmen
Act IV, Scene 3
A room in the prison.
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Enter Jailer, Wooer, Doctor.
Doctor
1 - 2
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Her distraction is more at some time of the moon than at
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other some, is it not?
Jailer
3 - 8
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She is continually in a harmless distemper, sleeps little,
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altogether without appetite, save often drinking, dreaming
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of another world and a better; and what broken piece of
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matter soe’er she’s about, the name Palamon lards it, that
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she farces ev’ry business withal, fits it to every question.
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Enter Daughter.
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Look where she comes, you shall perceive her behavior.
Daughter
9 - 13
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I have forgot it quite; the burden on’t was “Down-a,
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down-a,” and penn’d by no worse man than Giraldo, Emilia’s
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schoolmaster. He’s as fantastical, too, as ever he may go
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upon ’s legs, for in the next world will Dido see Palamon,
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and then will she be out of love with Aeneas.
Doctor
14
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What stuff’s here? Poor soul!
Jailer
15
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Ev’n thus all day long.
Daughter
16 - 23
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Now for this charm that I told you of, you must bring a
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piece of silver on the tip of your tongue, or no ferry.
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Then, if it be your chance to come where the blessed
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spirits—as there’s a sight now! We maids that have our
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livers perish’d, crack’d to pieces with love, we shall come
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there, and do nothing all day long but pick flowers with
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Proserpine. Then will I make Palamon a nosegay, then let him
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mark me—then—
Doctor
24
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How prettily she’s amiss! Note her a little further.
Daughter
25 - 33
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Faith, I’ll tell you; sometime we go to barley-break, we of
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the blessed. Alas, ’tis a sore life they have i’ th’ tother
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place, such burning, frying, boiling, hissing, howling,
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chatt’ring, cursing! O, they have shrewd measure! Take heed:
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if one be mad, or hang or drown themselves, thither they
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go—Jupiter bless us!—and there shall we be put in a cauldron
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of lead and usurers’ grease, amongst a whole million of
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cutpurses, and there boil like a gammon of bacon that will
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never be enough.
Doctor
34
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How her brain coins!
Daughter
35 - 41
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Lords and courtiers that have got maids with child, they are
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in this place. They shall stand in fire up to the nav’l, and
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in ice up to th’ heart, and there th’ offending part burns,
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and the deceiving part freezes: in troth a very grievous
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punishment, as one would think, for such a trifle. Believe
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me, one would marry a leprous witch to be rid on’t, I’ll
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assure you.
Doctor
42 - 43
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How she continues this fancy! ’Tis not an engraff’d madness,
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but a most thick and profound melancholy.
Daughter
44 - 49
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To hear there a proud lady and a proud city-wife howl
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together! I were a beast and I’ld call it good sport. One
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cries, “O, this smoke!” th’ other, “This fire!” One cries,
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“O, that ever I did it behind the arras!” and then howls;
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th’ other curses a suing fellow and her garden-house.
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Sings.
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“I will be true, my stars, my fate,” etc.
Jailer
50
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What think you of her, sir?
Doctor
51 - 52
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I think she has a perturb’d mind, which I cannot minister
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to.
Jailer
53
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Alas, what then?
Doctor
54 - 55
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Understand you she ever affected any man ere she beheld
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Palamon?
Jailer
56 - 57
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I was once, sir, in great hope she had fix’d her liking on
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this gentleman, my friend.
Wooer
58 - 60
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I did think so too, and would account I had a great
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penn’worth on’t to give half my state that both she and I at
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this present stood unfeignedly on the same terms.
Doctor
61 - 89
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That intemp’rate surfeit of her eye hath distemper’d the
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other senses. They may return and settle again to execute
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their preordain’d faculties, but they are now in a most
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extravagant vagary. This you must do: confine her to a place
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where the light may rather seem to steal in than be
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permitted. Take upon you, young sir her friend, the name of
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Palamon, say you come to eat with her, and to commune of
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love. This will catch her attention, for this her mind beats
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upon; other objects that are inserted ’tween her mind and
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eye become the pranks and friskins of her madness. Sing to
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her such green songs of love as she says Palamon hath sung
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in prison. Come to her, stuck in as sweet flowers as the
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season is mistress of, and thereto make an addition of some
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other compounded odors which are grateful to the sense. All
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this shall become Palamon, for Palamon can sing, and Palamon
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is sweet, and ev’ry good thing. Desire to eat with her,
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carve her, drink to her, and still among intermingle your
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petition of grace and acceptance into her favor. Learn what
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maids have been her companions and play-feres, and let them
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repair to her with Palamon in their mouths, and appear with
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tokens, as if they suggested for him. It is a falsehood she
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is in, which is with falsehoods to be combated. This may
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bring her to eat, to sleep, and reduce what’s now out of
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square in her into their former law and regiment. I have
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seen it approv’d, how many times I know not, but to make the
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number more I have great hope in this. I will, between the
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passages of this project, come in with my appliance. Let us
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put it in execution; and hasten the success, which doubt not
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will bring forth comfort.